Sharing The Wealth

How advisors can help families talk about finances and retirement

by Juan José Pérez

The Great Wealth Transfer is underway. Between 2024 and 2048, an estimated $124 trillion will be passed from one generation to the next, according to Cerulli Associates.

However, a recent survey from the Nationwide Retirement Institute found that many investors are not having the family discussions needed to make that transition smoother and more intentional. Nearly half (47%) of investors have not had conversations with relatives about how they are planning for financial security in retirement, and another 17% said they do not think those conversations are necessary.

On the surface, these discussions may not seem urgent. For many retirees, it can seem like everything is under control – until circumstances change, which can happen fast. That’s when you need loved ones to not only understand the plan but also be ready to play their part.

This is where advisors can make a meaningful difference. By helping older generations share their wishes and prepare family members for future responsibilities, advisors can support smoother, more efficient, dignified transitions. They can also strengthen relationships with the broader family in the process – a particularly important step as a recent Cerulli Associates survey found more than 70% of heirs plan to switch advisors after inheriting assets.

However, it’s important to remember that these conversations can feel deeply personal. In fact, our survey found a clear generational divide in how investors view an advisor’s role in facilitating family financial planning discussions. Just 16% of Baby Boomers and older (62+) and 32% of Gen Xers (age 46-61) said they would welcome that kind of involvement, compared with 60% of Millennials (age 30-45).

That hesitation is understandable. Older generations may value privacy more than younger generations or may simply feel confident making decisions on their own. It’s also worth noting that parents typically spend their middle-aged years as caregivers of their children – so for many, it may feel odd or uncomfortable to start thinking about helping their adult children understand their plan and the role they may play when the caregiving roles are reversed.

But that reluctance does not eliminate the need for these important conversations. In fact, it highlights an opportunity. Advisors who approach these discussions thoughtfully can help families break through avoidance, build understanding and create continuity across generations, strengthening their practice as a result. In doing so, they can position themselves as a trusted partner in the moments that matter most.

Here are three practical ways advisors can help families start and sustain financial planning and retirement conversations.

1. Start With Value And Wishes

The best family financial conversations do not begin with account balances. They begin with what matters most. Advisors should start with questions that uncover values, goals and priorities. This may include end-of-life wishes, healthcare and long-term care preferences, funeral plans, legacy goals and how decisions should be handled if someone can no longer speak for themselves.

These conversations are already top of mind for families who are having them. Our survey found that older investors who do talk with family members are most focused on end-of-life care wishes (50%), how to access financial accounts (42%) and plans for passing on assets (39%). 

Use simple prompts to help guide these discussions. Advisors might ask, “What does financial success look like for your family?” or “What concerns you most about your financial future?” These may seem like simple questions, but they can help set the foundation for future conversations.

When families define their priorities and values early, future decisions about spending, saving, caregiving, philanthropy and inheritance become clearer. The conversation becomes less about reacting in a crisis and more about following a shared roadmap. 

2. Create A Structured, Safe Forum For Dialogue

Families often avoid financial conversations for understandable reasons: fear of conflict, discomfort with sensitive topics or concern that someone will feel judged or misunderstood. Advisors can help by creating a setting that makes the discussion more constructive.

That starts with structure. Rather than trying to squeeze these topics into a routine review meeting, you can organize dedicated family meetings with a clear purpose. Set expectations in advance and establish simple ground rules. For example, every voice should be heard, confidentiality will be respected and no immediate decisions are required.

You can also leverage structured agendas. Guide the discussion around family goals, core financial concepts and the roles different family members may eventually play. This makes the conversation feel less like a confrontation and more like a shared planning session.

Perhaps most importantly, serve as a neutral presence. Advisors have the unique capability to translate complex financial issues into plain language and keep discussions focused on preparation rather than disagreement.

With the right framework, what might otherwise be an uncomfortable conversation can become a forward-looking one. 

3. Turn Conversation Into Action

A productive family conversation is only valuable if it leads to clarity and follow-through. Advisors play an important role in helping families move from discussion to execution. After each meeting, summarize key takeaways, document agreed-upon priorities and identify open questions or areas where more alignment is needed. This step alone can prevent confusion later.

From there, you can help families build a practical, shared roadmap. Depending on the situation, that may include updates to estate and legacy plans, education funding strategies or caregiving considerations. The point is not to resolve every issue at once, but to translate intentions into next steps that are documented and revisited over time.

Equally important, advisors should build regular checkpoints to revisit decisions as circumstances change. Family dynamics evolve, and plans must evolve with them. By building periodic reviews into the process, advisors can help ensure that earlier conversations remain relevant and that families stay prepared as life unfolds. Well-documented, actionable plans ensure family conversations lead to meaningful outcomes, not just good intentions.

Advisors who help families talk together can differentiate themselves in powerful ways. By anchoring conversations in values, creating safe structures for dialogue and turning discussion into action, advisors position themselves as trusted partners across generations. They help families prepare for wealth transfer, as well as the decisions, responsibilities and emotions that often come with it.

Ultimately, that is the bigger value advisors provide. By helping clients and their families manage assets – as well as use those assets intentionally and confidently – you are setting them up for success now and for the future they hope to build.

1- https://news.nationwide.com/millennial-investors-are-ready-to-bring-their-advisor-to-the-family-table-baby-boomers-not-so-much/